-Don't Give Up- When Life Gets Hard
Hi friends! I hope all is well. I'm switching gears a little this week to give everyone some time to practice what we've already learned over the last few weeks. I pray that you've been able to amp up your time in the bedroom. One thing I want you to remember is that just like a diet doesn't last forever neither will a few fun nights in the bedroom. This has to be a lifestyle change. You have to commit to setting aside time at least weekly to be intimate with your spouse. It is vital to the life of your marriage. But I also understand that it takes two to tango and if your spouse is not playing along you can only do so much. My advice is to, of course, pray and then be diligent about letting them know what you want. If they still don't respond- turn them over to God because they are in disobedience. The Bible clearly says-
(BCJT)-1st Corinthians (7:3)- Men, satisfy the sexual needs of your wives, and wives, you do the same for your husbands. (v.5)- Don't withhold sex from each other unless you agree to abstain for spiritual reasons. After the agreed-upon time, express your sexual feelings to each other so that you won't be tempted to express them to someone else.
I know some of you are frustrated because you are trying everything to spice up your marriage and nothing is working. I have been there..I totally get it. And there is nothing worse than putting yourself out there then being rejected. I don't have a cure all for you, but I do have some major love for you!! If I could give you a big hug I would. We need each other. We need to be honest about our struggles so our brothers and sister aren't going through life alone. When we are transparent, it allows others to learn from our mistakes and not only that, we get to do exactly what God called us to do and that is to love people.
I know that sounds scary. and especially as a christian we feel like if our lives aren't living up to what we think they should then we have no right to help anyone else with theirs. That is exactly where the devil wants you to be--Defeated and feeling condemned. Remember this-- Nobody is perfect!!! How do you think we gain knowledge to make it through the hard seasons in life? It's by going through the bad times and learning how to understand this journey called life. You can ask most preachers and I bet they would all agree that out of some of their hardest test, came their greatest sermons. I encourage a healthy sexual relationship so much because that was one of the main reasons my marriage almost failed. You see we learn and grow through the difficult seasons in our lives. And the cool thing about it is that whatever wisdom we gain, we can pass on to others. That is love. That is reaching out the hand of compassion and helping to cheer others on that are still in the test.
Is my marriage perfect? Heck no! Do we have great sex? Heck yes! Do we communicate? Well...we could use some work. You see, we are a work in progress, as are all of you. So, I don't want you to get discouraged if you've tried to loosen up your spouse in the bedroom and it didn't work. I have amazing sex, but I've been trying to have deep conversation with my husband for 17 years and we've hardly scratched the surface. So, I know what it feels like to crave something, yet never quite get it. Does it frustrate the heck out of me, YES!!!! Are there times I want to run away and leave no forwarding address? YES!!!! Do I talk to people weekly that are going through the same thing? YES!!!! You are not alone in your struggle. Whether it's sex, communication, money, or whatever plagues you---MARRIAGE IS HARD WORK. It is not for the faint at heart or those that give up easily. This is hardcore, y'all.
Basically this week I just want to encourage you not to give up. Keep trying, keep pushing, keep praying, keep reminding yourself that things can change. But most importantly, even if they don't change, you still have a choice whether or not to let the hard season you are in suck the life out of you or not. Choose happiness! Choose joy! People will always let you down, God never will. Find your fulfillment in Him. Be determined to share your journey by loving those around you. Life is too short to hold on to negativity. Be courageous- Be bold- Be happy- Live in the moment!
Happy reading! Until next time-